Thoughts of Arm-Chairman Light

 

(Messages from an idling mind)

 

Gathered by John Light

An extract from his Little Known Book

To be published by Photon Press at some well concealed date

In a negligible format at an unbelievable price

With an unassuming cover

Will be available from the usual outfalls,

releasing these thoughts into the wild.

 

 

 

The Universe

 

Why isn't the Universe more like an armchair?

 

Even time does not last forever.

 

In a two dimensional universe at least you wouldn't have to get up.

 

There are large parts of the Universe which look as though they shouldn't work at all.

 

 

Religion

 

Religion is an invention of the devil.

 

How can a belief in intelligent design account for cricket?

 

Religion is the root of almost all evil.

 

Religion sanctifies intolerance.

 

The  marriage service should ask:  Do you take this man seriously?

 

Religion destroys people's understanding, their judgment and above all their humanity.

 

People will commit any crime, however inhuman, in the name of religion.

 

Religion is the cloak of ignorance.

 

 

 

 

Philosophy

We can't all be the same otherwise we wouldn't know which of us we were.


If I think positively while all those around me are thinking negatively, I may disappear with a flash and a bang!


The people who try to keep ahead of things are the ones who get run over.

 

Nothing is easy; something is more difficult.

 

Tomorrow is on its way.

 

An accident is an experiment you weren't ready for.

 

The human race has always been better at reproduction than catering.

 

We don't always realize what goes on in the past.


Only the future can redeem the past.
 

There's no rush to hurry.

 

I sometimes think my brain has a mind of its own.

 

Youth is a wasting asset so waste it while you can.

 

She who shelves shelving shelves last.

 

The future is a journey from which there is no return.

 

I'll be here in a minute.

 

A lot of the world looks lovely until you get closer.

 

The most important aspect of fatherhood is letting off the fireworks.

 

It is unwise to try to look further into the future than teatime.

 

There are no yawning gaps in my life - I yawn all the time.

Does the subconscious have a subconscience?

 

Which are more important ideas or ideals?

 

I must think more deeply, listen more carefully, behave more responsibly and stop having a good time.


Will civilisation ever happen?
 

 

 

Literature

 

Pedagogues make poor promoters of poetry.


People think the little words are unimportant, but would you rather be out of date or out on a date?

 

Everyday Life

 

Is a finished list one that is complete or one that's all been done?

 

The sooner you start the longer it'll take.

 

Teenagers are children who are no longer any fun.

 

There's more to life than just being bright and shiny.

 

Television is a widely distributed nuisance.

 

 

 

Economics

 

Big business plays uncontrolled, the one-man band has his trumpet impounded.

 

Advertising should inform not bamboozle.

 

Do we really want the world to be run for profit?

 


Art

 

Art isn't a progression, it's an exploration of more and more.

 

Artistic license isn't meant to apply to the artist's behaviour.

 

The camera records; the eye appreciates.

 

 

 

 

Politics


Secrecy, surveillance and slander are the triple towers of tyranny.


Law is only law if no one is above it.

 

Law must apply equally to everyone otherwise it is just an instrument of tyranny.


In a democracy the government has a duty to supply information to citizens, not keep secrets from them. 

 

Society shouldn't charge for education because society needs educated citizens .

 

Why is there still no freedom of information?

 

Official secrecy destroys democracy.

Ignorance is slavery; knowing is the key.


The institution of Whips has turned the House of Commons into a House of Sheep.
 

Government advisers should advise in public.


The government doesn't need to know - so don't tell it.

 

You can't really reason with someone unless you have the bigger sword.

There is no absolute safety the only absolutes are anarchy and tyranny.


All governments know too much and understand too little.


The rich can afford to be generous; the strong can afford to be merciful.
So why is the British government so mean and merciless to asylum seekers?
 


Occupations

 

A psychologist is someone who stirs up trouble.

 

My occupation? Hoping for the best.

 

A chemist is one who battles against the elements

 

 

 

Confessions

 

I've led a blameless life - no one's to blame for the life I've led.
 

Goodness is second nature to me;  it's my first nature that causes me so much trouble.

 

 

Medicine

 

If the dentist's is closed, stand at the door and shout "Open Wide!"

 

 


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(Page last amended 24 July 2017)

The contents of this site are copyright © John Light.